Some Important Things

Hi friends,

It’s been a minute, and I wanted to get real for a second. It hasn’t been all sunshine and puppies over here (in fact it’s been storming literally quite a bit). There’s been a lot of stressing over the news, getting ragey over social media posts, feeling resentful about being stuck inside, berating myself for being ungrateful when I should be focusing on how lucky I am, crying over the injustice in this country, picking fights with people, and at times just really letting the dark parts of my mind take over. We have so much to be anxious about as a society right now, but we also have a lot to be grateful for. So anyway, here are some things you’ve probably heard before, but I think they’re super important and worth repeating.

Black Lives Matter 
I hope it goes without saying, but I support Black Lives Matter. This is not about me, but I hate that I haven’t talked about this on here before, and I hate that in the past I’ve been too nervous about saying the wrong thing to say anything, but that changes now. I will not be quiet and hope my passivity will somehow lead to change.

I’ve been shocked and disgusted, along with the rest of the world, at the consistently abhorrent behavior of our police force and my eyes/heart will never be able to unsee the MANY systems in this country specifically designed to keep BIPOC down. I hate that so many people of color have died and suffered to get us to this point, but the revolution is here and it’s not going away.

Don’t stop talking about race when the social media posts go back to normal.
Don’t stop saying the names of the victims of police brutality (Breonna Taylor’s murderers are STILL free, by the way).
Don’t stop signing petitions and donating and buying from Black-owned businesses.
Don’t stop asking questions about the white-washed “history” you learned about in school.
Don’t stop having difficult conversations (yes, with your family, too).
Don’t stop learning how to be actively anti-racist (not just “not racist”—that’s not enough).
Don’t stop when you, and everyone will, mess up.
Don’t get defensive when you, and you will, get called out.

Everything is a learning opportunity. I have turned to defensiveness in the past. It’s easier than admitting you were wrong. But I’m here to tell you that once you admit it, you can move past it, and that’s a much better feeling than anger about being wrong in the first place.

Instead of resisting change, let’s accept and move forward TOGETHER.

What I’ve been doing: 

At work, Sephora took the 15% Pledge where we are committed to dedicating 15% of our shelf space to Black-owned businesses and matching employee donations to organizations that support Black communities (National CARES Mentoring Movement, The National Black Justice Coalition, Change.org, ACLU, NAACP, and so many more). We are hosting Instagram Lives with some amazing Black leaders, we are enrolling in courses about diversity and inclusion, intrinsic bias, and holding forums for BIPOC to tell their stories and truly be heard.

And at home I’ve been learning first and foremost, but also donating, signing petitions, having conversations, consuming and reposting impactful social media posts, and buying from Black-owned businesses.

Here’s what you can do: 

Here’s an anti-racism reading list so that if you, like me, are learning how to do better, these are a great place to start. I’m reading “How to Be An Anti-Racist” by X Kendi. And I have many more on my list once I’m finished.

There’s an amazing lineup on Netflix both documentary and fictional (I just started Dear White People).

Shop Black-owned businesses—here’s an awesome list from Etsy. I recently bought Lit Soul Candles which are upcycled soup cans, meaning the canned goods they once contained were used to feed homeless populations, and now they’re amazing-smelling meditation candles with a healing crystal at the bottom of each one. I gifted one to each of the women in my family.

Find organizations you can donate to here and here.

Here are a bunch of children’s books to help teach your little ones about anti-racism from the very beginning. You can even buy them from local bookstores around the country through bookshop.org.

VOTE!!

If you are able to, please, please, please register to vote. Our president has repeatedly proven to us that he does not care about Black lives (or immigrants, or women, or protecting us from COVID… the list goes on). And not voting is a vote for him. He has to go.

WEAR A DAMN MASK 

This pandemic is affecting everyone, but it is disproportionately killing people of color. We HAVE to protect vulnerable communities. By not wearing a mask you are telling the world that your convenience is more important than other people’s lives (like my grandma, my mom, my immunocompromised friends, and literally entire races of people who are most likely to die from it).

We are learning more every day and info changes, but just because you’re over staying inside does not mean the risk has lessened. It has done quite the opposite since states (like Florida) have been opening up prematurely, but we know now that wearing a mask GREATLY reduces the risk of transference.

Stay six feet apart. Stay outside or in your home. Wear a mask. Wash your hands. And for the love of god, listen to the CENTER OF DISEASE CONTROL over the Karens and Todds on Facebook who think they understand the intricacies of a global pandemic better than the CDC.

And finally, because of these insane statistics, I’d like to informally announce that we are postponing our wedding. We are working on new save-the-dates and praying that our new date will land safely on the other side of this pandemic, but if not, we’ll postpone again because keeping people safe is more important than any party will ever be. Officially announcement coming soon.

Please take care of yourselves and others. If you have questions or want to talk about any of this stuff, please reach out. I’m here for you.