Sponsored Post: This post is sponsored by Wente Vineyards, but the content and opinions expressed here are my own.
Two years ago, it looked like I settling in. It was a nesting year. My apartment’s furnishings drastically improved—I decorated for each holiday, bought kitchen supplies and blogged a lot. I started a new (boring) job that year with great benefits and more money. Everything looked very in place. And it made me all the more anxious.
After months of dreaming I was trapped in a sinking car, getting robbed of all the things I cherish or losing children I was responsible for watching, I realized I needed to make a change. I decided to quit my job and see where things went from there.
Immediately, my car—which had recently been paid off—was hit by a semi, and suddenly I had to deal with the entirely unappealing process of buying a new car (everyone was safe—I am v grateful, but still). On top of leaving my cushy job and losing my car, my long-term relationship was coming to an end. And just like that, I went from settling in to overhauling everything.
The past year hasn’t been the easiest—transitions never are—but y’all, I made the best of it. I took a temporary job nannying, which I knew I would love, and I freelanced on the side. I don’t particularly condone quitting a good job without a safety net, but I guess I kind of do. If you’re not happy, who cares about your resume? I didn’t. It was scary. It worked out.
During that time I went through three different roommates, but I also made new friends, got closer to my old ones, explored new places, ran a marathon and, of course, drank lots and lots of wine.
I didn’t spend nearly as much time expressing myself on the blog last year, but in a way that felt more authentic. Pouring my insecurities and worries out on the internet when I could barely articulate them to the people who needed me to figure my life out IRL didn’t really seem fair. I took a step back.
My word of the year was “freedom,” and while I hoped that would bring clarity or a job that allowed me to forget about my bills and go on adventures, it ended up meaning things had to get crazy for a while before they could get better. But they did get better.
I got a new car that I love. I have a different outlook on relationships and what I need going into the future. I found awesome freelancing opportunities while I cared for two of the cutest children I’ve ever seen. I remembered how excited I am for a future with my own children one day. And as of two months ago, I started a new job that I’m absolutely stoked about (I’m a writer at Sephora now, ICYMI).
I doubted my decisions a lot over the past year. There were moments where I cried into my pillow (Ziggy pawing at my head, trying to lick my tears), or called my mom or sister hoping they would tell me I was doing the right things. But ultimately, regardless of whether I was able to get a new, nicer car or score a badass job, right now I am more me than I have been in a long, long time.
It took messing pretty much everything up pretty bad to get here, but I am so happy I did.
TL;DR? Watch the video to get the gist.
Thanks to Wente Vineyards (in my old stomping grounds, Livermore) for sponsoring this post. Learn more about their delicious wines here.
cheers to this!
Here's to messing everything up to find some truth!❤
Lady, this is the TRUTH. I feel you on every level and I'm always looking for new wine!
Note to self: Wente gives you abs. *goes out and buys a crate of wine*