New Year’s in Tahoe

I said “cabin,” but what I really meant was “70s-swinger-pad.” This three-story house had alpaca fur wall hangings depicting everything from llamas to cats riding bears. There were many a decorative cat painting, and ginormous rocks adorned the basement hallway. My favorite parts, however, were the sex mirrors at each room’s headboard and the secret passageway (slash peeping Tom door?) that swung open from the bathroom mirror to the laundry room.

Here’s the balcony from the third story (which you climbed a spiral staircase to get to) dusted with perfect powdery snow. After I got over the initial panic that comes along with being a Florida-born-and-raised person in an SUV driving on icy roads for the first time ever, I got all giddy and high-pitched about all the fluffy white stuff.

Here’s the view from the front door. It wasn’t long before Betty the Blazer was covered in frost/sand and the windshield was disgusting due to the windshield wiper fluid freezing.

 You can’t tell, but there’s a big ole pom on the top of this hat. I think that’s why I bought it.

I set out to go snowboarding for the first time on New Year’s Eve. I had never been skiing or sledding or snowshoeing for that matter, but I had to start somewhere. I bought all these warm weather clothing pieces in the children’s section. That red Columbia number was $15, which means it was cheaper than my beloved pom hat. Priorities, my friends.

This photo was taken after my semi-successful run down the baby slope and before I destroyed my freakishly long tailbone. I’m sitting on a pillow right now, over a week later, and that bitch is still throbbing. Turns out snowboarding might not be the best sport for humans with tails.

 But that view though!

Once I thawed out and was safely back at the swinger pad, I put on my sequin skirt and a skimpy shirt because who wears warm clothes on NYE when it’s 15 degrees out? Panzies, that’s who.

We pregamed with fireball shots, champagne Quarters and beer before taking a bus to a house party with an indoor pool, sauna and hot tub. The highlight had to be when I jumped in the ridiculously cold pool and had to walk about a quarter of a mile uphill with ice hair because the limo (yes, limo–who am I?) that took us back to the swinger pad was afraid to drive up the hills. Who else can say they started 2015 with icicles in their hair?

My first 2015 hangover was spent laughing a lot over a late breakfast, taking in this view, sitting by the fireplace and drinking hot apple cider.

 I also built a tiny snowman.

Found a ginormous icicle.

Played on the beach.

 Made some beautiful new friends.

 Admired ice sculptures.

And slid around on the frozen sand. Basically it was a fantastic way to ring in the new year. Shortly after leaving Tahoe, I packed up and headed for Napa, but that’s a story for a different post.

How was your New Year?