Just look at that beautiful and necessary wall art.
You know how sometimes your laptop decides to turn on you just when you decide you most need it? Like last night, for example, when I was ready to get my online workout videos on, blog for today and work on some freelance shiz, but then my tracking pad started highlighting and clicking on everything like it had just followed a dose of speed with four vodka Redbulls so I went to my apartment gym instead. I had been looking forward to seeing the new gym since the office had been boasting about its remodel that came with a fancy new swipe key and everything!
The last time I visited this gym, all I found were three rickety treadmills (that didn’t even have cup holders), a broken stair master, a stationary bike and absolutely no air flow whatsoever. I figured a remodel was overdue and assumed the new and improved gym would have free weights (if not machines), a new stair master, hopefully new treadmills and, at the very least, a fan. To my chagrin, I found new wall art, a couple big bouncy balls and yoga mats. The same broken stair master, the same treadmills that feel like they’re going to fall over with every step despite being a small person who runs on her toes, no weights and no fan.
I ran on the treadmill and within 15 minutes I was dripping like I was in a sauna and the lights went out. Apparently the gym designers think people working out don’t need air, a water fountain or light for more than 15 minutes at a time. But hey, I’m super glad they decided to invest in a fancy swipe key because that, my friends, is what an apartment gym is really about. AmIright?
So after two miles I went back to my apartment and cried in the shower because my life is so hard, and now here I am behind on everything, not sore and my laptop is now trying to italicize and highlight everything in this post. I would’ve shared a ballin’ playlist with you today, but technology hates me. All right, friends, I’m done bitching for now. Wish me luck at the Apple Store.
the power at the gym in my old apt complex would go out any time you put the treadmill over 6.5 it was weird. shower cries help sometimes though
Ugggh. Pretty sure Apple is a soul reaver. Be careful out there!!
Oh my goodness I could use a deep shower cry. But really, your apartment sucks – do you need me to write them a letter?
thats bologna. protest the gym. i wish my apartment had a gym. it would make my life so much easier and then id never have to leave…
Apartment gyms are the worst, my last apartment had a gym that was basically the exact same as the before of yours. They don't exactly inspire you to work out hard!
i just wanted to say that this post is hilarious and you are hilarious and i love your blog and am glad i found it the end.
I'd offer my apartment gym to you, but you'd have to be willing to fly to the Philippines. That's cool, right?!